Get all 14 Wild Earp releases available on Bandcamp and save 10%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of The Krampus Song, That Old Moth-Eaten Suit, A Cynical Christmas, Dyin' for Easy Livin', I Wanna Go, Ain't It a Shame (When Your Horse Goes Lame), Wild Earp Saves Christmas, Oligarchy Blues, and 6 more.
1. |
Cynical Christmas
03:41
|
|||
|
Dear old Father Christmas, he don’t come around no more
He don’t know your name, he don’t speak your language
I guess you’ll have to buy your Christmas at the store
Jesus Christ don’t come around no more
Jesus Christ don’t come around no more
The reason for the season is commerce, you see
So I’m sorry, but you’ll have to take a back seat, J.C.
Jesus Christ don’t come around no more
I don’t put up no Christmas tree, I don’t waste my time
I don’t go out caroling, it’s too cold outside
‘Cause there ain’t nothing sacred, ain’t nothing like old times
Just a Cynical Christmas, another year gone by
Santa Claus don’t come around no more
Santa Claus don’t come around no more
The corporations are gonna do it their way,
Who needs that big ol’ fat ol’ man anyway
Santa Claus don’t come around no more
Well, I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus
I told my dad and what a stink it was
He punched Santa in the face and gave Mom what for
Well Santa Claus don’t come around here no more
I don’t put up no Christmas tree, I don’t waste my time
I don’t go out caroling, it’s too cold outside
‘Cause there ain’t nothing sacred, ain’t nothing like old times
Just a Cynical Christmas, another year gone by
See, Father Christmas, he don’t come around no more
Father Christmas, he don’t come around no more
He’s got two kids in Nashville, he’s got one in Singapore
And he don’t pay no alimony and he don’t pay no child support
I don’t put up no Christmas tree, I don’t waste my time
I don’t go out caroling, it’s too cold outside
‘Cause there ain’t nothing sacred, ain’t nothing like old times
Just a Cynical Christmas, another year gone by
|
||||
2. |
||||
|
No, I won’t be home for Christmas this year
To bring the good cheer, there’s no way I fear
So I’m sending tidings to you
I’m so sad and blue out here
All of my nights are silent
All of my days are long
I’ve got no money to buy a thing
So I’m sending you this Christmas song
No I won’t be home for Christmas this year
There’s nobody near, just me and my beer
I hope and I pray next year will improve
And I’ll be on the move back home.
This time a year ago was fine indeed
I danced, I traveled, and I spent
Last Christmas seems to me a dream
This year was certainly Hell sent
So I won’t be home for Christmas this year
Sorry for the tears, I know it’s hard to hear
Just pull down my stocking don’t bother with the tree
It’s Christmas without me my dear
No, I won’t be home for Christmas this year
|
||||
3. |
Pretty Paper
02:51
|
|||
|
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
Wrap your presents to your darling from you
Pretty pencils to write "I love you"
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
Crowded streets, busy feet hustle by him
Downtown shoppers, Christmas is nigh
There he sits all alone on the sidewalk
Hoping that you won't pass him by
Should you stop?, better not, much too busy
You'd better hurry, my how time does fly
In the distance the ringing of laughter
And in the midst of the laughter he cries
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
Wrap your presents to your darling from you
Pretty pencils to write "I love you"
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
Wrap your presents to your darling from you
Pretty pencils to write "I love you"
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
Pretty paper, pretty ribbons of blue
|
||||
4. |
||||
|
To heck with ole Santa Claus
Last year I hung my stockings by the chimney
And ole Santa didn't bring me anything
Well I wrote a note and I told him what to bring me
But I didn't even hear his sleigh bells ring
So to heck with ol' Santa Clause
When he goes dashin' through the snow I hope he falls
I like to hit him in his (ho ho ho) with a bunch of big snowballs
To heck with ole Santa Claus
This year I'll build a big fire by the fireplace
I'll be like a little pig I read about
If that big bad wolf in red comes down my chimney
He's a gonna scorch his whiskers there's no doubt
So to heck with ol' Santa Clause
When he goes dashin' through the snow I hope he falls
I like to hit him in his (ho ho ho) with a bunch of big snowballs
To heck with ol' Santa Claus
Yeah to heck with ole Santa Claus
|
||||
5. |
||||
|
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, I'm tellin' you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town
He's makin' a list, he's checkin' it twice
He's gonna find out who's naughty, who's nice
Santa Claus is comin' to town
He sees you when you're sleeping
He knows when you're awake
He knows if you've been bad or good
So you'd better be good, for goodness sake
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, and I'm tellin' you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town
He sees you when you're sleeping
He knows when you're awake
He knows if you've been bad or good
So be good, for goodness sake
You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, and I'm tellin' you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town
Santa Claus is comin' to town
|
||||
6. |
||||
|
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
Remember, Christ your savior was born on Christmas Day
To save you all from Satan's power when you were gone astray
Tidings of comfort and joy
Tidings of comfort and joy
Satan delights in all the hearts of men he keeps in chains
But jubilant still was the word that from the angel came
That man the righteous power hath the ancient beast to tame
Tidings of comfort and joy
Tidings of comfort and joy
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
The Golden Gun of God within your mortal hand does lay
'Twas giv’n to you the potency the evil one to slay
Tidings of comfort and joy, indeed
Tidings of comfort and joy
|
||||
7. |
||||
|
I saw a ghost on Christmas floating o’er the drift
I saw a ghost on Christmas day in nothing but a shift
She bade me come unto her and join her in the air
She said “Come be my partner. Dance with me if you dare”
And I dared, and the air swept beneath me
And we danced to the fading of the light
And the beautiful remnants of this Christmas revenant stayed with me
Deep into the night
And as I looked more closely in the half-light of the moon
I saw it was my love who had died in the the flower of her youth
She leaned in close to kiss me and in her cold embrace
I saw a ghostly tear of joy stream down her perfect face
And the years just rolled off my shoulders
And my feet kicked light into the air
And we spun and twirled and sailed throughout the heavens
Free of all earthly cares
And then I looked below us and frozen in the drift
I saw what was my body which now had become stiff
I must have stayed out too long in the frigid cold outside
And now if you look up on Christmas Day, you’ll see me dancing with my bride
|
||||
8. |
||||
|
We don’t need a lot to make it Christmas
We don't need bows or pretty paper on the presents
Just a miracle or two, three or four could do
It feels like a Christmas miracle when I'm with you
I started the car to go downtown
We'd been driving that thing all around
It was so darn cold we couldn't bike
I glanced at the gauge to see how long I had before the tank sputtered out, I’d have to call my dad
But the tank was half full, it was a Christmas miracle!
It was a miracle!
A Christmas miracle!
Look out Santa, we got magic of our own!
I got home from the bank with my head in my hands
The mortgage man had crushed my plans
He said, “bottom line is you need more money"
Not a dime to my name and nothing to cook
I opened the fridge to take a quick look
There was leftover pizza, a Christmas miracle!
It was a miracle!
A Christmas miracle!
Look out Santa, we got magic of our own!
Well I know it's been a bummer of a December
And it’s easy to get cynical- until you’re in the middle of a bonafide Christmas miracle!
A miracle!
A Christmas miracle!
Look out Santa, we got magic of our own!
Well the snow blower blew it’s last breath,
It coughed and wheezed in a smoky death
And my shovel was busted too, wouldn’t you know?
I woke up early at 10 am
And to my surprise Jesus, Mary, Amen!
There was a two foot wide path leading right through the snow!
It was a miracle!
A Christmas miracle!
Look out Santa, we got magic of our own!
|
||||
9. |
||||
|
Be generous this Christmas with your kisses
Be generous this Christmas with your hugs
Be generous this Christmas, fulfill all of my wishes
Be generous this Christmas with your love
Now you’ve been awful stingy with your cuddles and your caresses
And I don’t mean to be greedy but I’m eager for a whole lot more
There’s no need to ration our enamored osculation
All of your lovin' is all I'm lookin’ for
So be generous this Christmas with your kisses
Be generous this Christmas with your hugs
Be generous this Christmas, fulfill all of my wishes
Be generous this Christmas with your love
Now, I was waitin’ while you was datin’ some other
I’ve been patient for a long, long time
All I need from you is just a little kiss or two
Or three or four, or maybe a couple hundred more
Present me with your presence underneath the mistletoe
I don’t need no presents otherways
I've got a predilection for your lovin’ and affection
Send your kisses my direction this holiday
And be generous this Christmas with your kisses
Be generous this Christmas with your hugs
Be generous this Christmas, give me everything that's on my wishlist
Be generous this Christmas with your love
With your love
|
||||
10. |
||||
|
It was Christmas in prison and the food was real good
We had turkey and pistols carved out of wood
I dream of her always, even when I don't dream
And her name's on my tongue and her blood's in my stream
Wait awhile eternity
Old mother nature's got nothing on me
Come to me, run to me
Come to me, now
We're rolling my sweetheart
We're flowing, by God
She reminds me of a chess game with someone I admire
Or a picnic in the rain after a prairie fire
Her heart is as big as this whole goddamn jail
And she's sweeter than saccharine at a drug store sale
Wait awhile eternity
Old mother nature's got nothing on me
Come to me, run to me
Come to me, now
We're rolling my sweetheart
We're flowing, by God
The search light in the big yard swings round with the gun
And spotlights the snowflakes like the dust in the sun
It's Christmas in prison
There'll be music tonight
I'll probably get homesick
I love you, goodnight
Wait awhile eternity
Old mother nature's got nothing on me
Come to me, run to me
Come to me, now
We're rolling my sweetheart
We're flowing, by God
|
||||
11. |
New Year, New You
02:42
|
|||
|
New year, new you, that’s cool, that’s fine
But if you go changin’ up baby
Just leave a little of the old you behind
Well I know sometimes I harp at you, and I know sometimes I preach
I know I often set the bar well beyond your reach
Now you say you plan to be a new man, but baby don’t you go too far
‘Cause if you didn’t change one hair on your head, I’d still love you just the way you are
New year, new you, that’s cool, that’s fine
But if you go changin’ up baby
Just leave a little of the old you behind
Might have a little bit extra in the middle, might have a little bit less up on top
Another crease in your brow don’t matter anyhow, I still love you and I just wont stop
And if you want to improve, go on and make your move, but don’t go changin’ on my account
‘Cause I’ll still love you just as much as today, sweet baby don’t you have any doubts
New year, new you, that’s cool, that’s fine
But if you go changin’ up baby
Just leave a little of the old you behind
Those magazines and tropical scenes will make you think you’ve got a long way to go
But I love it best with my head on your chest in our cozy little humble home
It might be not where you want to be, could be a life that you hadn’t planned
But no matter where we are, or the year of our car, you’ll always be my rock of a man
New year, new you, that’s cool, that’s fine
But if you go changin’ up baby
Just leave a little of the old you behind
That’s right, a little of the old you behind
One more time, a little of the old you behind
|
||||
Wild Earp Chicago, Illinois
Old school, new-fangled, funky country western rock'n'rollabilly.
If you like A Cynical Christmas, you may also like:
Heartache, Hangovers & Honky Tonks
by West of Texas
supported by 5 fans who also own “A Cynical Christmas”
go to album
supported by 5 fans who also own “A Cynical Christmas”
She's the heart and soul of a new generation of female country artists
go to album
Charlie Marie - EP
by Charlie Marie
supported by 4 fans who also own “A Cynical Christmas”
Every song on this EP is wonderfully written and preformed, truly an up and coming country star.
go to album
Cauthen's mix of classic country and old-school soul come together on this album about coming back from the brink.
go to album
A concept album where meteorology is a metaphor for anxiety, the new one from timing is artful indie at its finest.
go to album
The latest from acclaimed country musician Bonnie Montgomery delivers the raw, rustic sound for which she’s known.
go to album
Not the Marrying Kind
by Michelle Billingsley
supported by 4 fans who also own “A Cynical Christmas”
go to album
